A Twinless Twin

"TWINLESS"  TWINS: Never Alone

(due to space restrictions, Melodie's obituary can be accessed online - Halifax Chronicle Herald - expiry on 25 February 2003) {please excuse spelling & grammar erros - author is visually compromised}

PART I

The passages in Part II of this entry is a portion of a self-authored short version describing how I (Melanie, twin of Melodie and author) perceive my twin's passing and defines my loss in a manner in which I continues to find personal growth. 

Many family members and friends expressed their concern for
my well-being in what they described as a grieving need beyond
tolerance.  However, unknown to them - they had no knowledge of my knowing that the death of one of us was lurking in the days ahead.

Melodie knew the same thing so we had no reason to verbally discuss it and made the best of each day.  She prepared a good bye for me in the form of a digital processed photo of herself painting and next to her is a large stained-glass "Bluebird" that I had created for her many years ago.  The "Bluebird" is symbolic to the both of us....she was bestowed this icon within the hour of her birth.

On September 1, 1947 our Mother was in the process of childbearing however did not expect or prepare for twins.  There was a great deal of commotion during childbirth.  After a quick evaluation by the physician, Melodie, first born,  was wrapped in a blanket and passed to our Grandmother (Gram as she was endearingly known).  In keeping with Gram's sensitive ways she graciously picked up one of Melodie's little hands to offer a loving kiss and stated, "this is my little "Bluebird".

Moving Ahead:  As previously mentioned, both Melodie and I knew one of us would be leaving this world as we knew it and such would occur in the not too distant future.  We did not allow ourselves to become obsessively "hooked" by this knowledge and made the best of each day.

Melodie, suspecting that it was she who would be passing on,  prepared a good bye for me in the form of a digital photograph of herself painting and seated next to a large stained-glass "Bluebird" that I had made for her years ago.

Sadly, Melodie's life ended as we knew it would and in her late 50's.  She passed away due to  a respiratory arrest and heart failure while in her sleep when vacationing in Martinique.  It was in late February that she and Geoff felt the need for a change and a restful environment.  A few days before a scheduled trip to the Caribbean, Melodie and Geoff had overnight visitors and Melodie took advantage of the visit and asked her friend, a very talented photographer, for a portrait.  Her friend was humbled to be asked.

Their time spent in the southern climate was just what they had hoped it would be -- time to enjoy one another and at the same time participate in life in a totally different environment.  Melodie, while in Australia the year before had the opportunity of scuba diving in the location of the Great Barrier Reef....this was achieved by she moving in tandem with an instructor.  One can't possibly imagine how she was wanting and able to trust her life with a complete stranger - as just one glitch in the swimming effort could have been a fatal event.  Her lack of ability to "move along in the water independently" was impossible.  A spinal cord injury when in her 20's was the causative factor of her immobility. 

With that incredible accomplishment and the actual participation in the viewing of underwater landscape remains a wonderment t me.  The fact that she was a quadriplegic,  alone,  was enough for anyone to think that such an activity would be an outstanding life achievement.  This activity was not foreign to the character of Melodie --- she was known to push limits.  Her successes provided her a self-confidence to continue her experiences beyond our imaginations.

While in Martinique, Melodie saw another opportunity of exception and began to explore the possibility of herself  "swimming" with dolphins.  She was somewhat fearless in the water and I suspect this had provided her a window of experience and awareness of what she could achieve.  When realizing that it was possible to be with the dolphins, she added her wish to do so to her "list of wishes".   After making the decision to give it a try they found an individual who could provide both she and Geoff guidance on how and what would be required of Melodie to safely carry through with this profound opportunity.

Once again, the occasion was that of complete success and a moment in which she and Geoff wiould be prepared to add to their life's outstanding experiences.

That evening, Melodie remained in awe of the day's events however was extremely tired and took to her bed before the sun went down.  She was quick to fall asleep and it was that every night she quietly passed away.

I was very distressed that a state of compromised wellness dictated my absence from the funeral proceedings.  I did find some relief in knowing Melodie's spirit and energy would remain with me -- such as it did when we lived thousands of miles apart.

PART II - Never Alone

In keeping with her passing on to another level her spirit continues to provide me with re-newed energy accompanied with many gifts from and for the soul, and a greater wisdom.  These samplings are but a few virtues of her love and spiritual presence.  The scope of what my twin provides is well-beyond my ability to better portray/define/describe our continued connection in "twinship".

Melodie and I have a great deal of fun and heart warming connections in our own location and space since her death.  Indeed this connection was well tested as Melodie and Geoff would appear on my computer screen from as far away as the Great Barrier Reef.  I have absolute belief in her continued visits regardless from where and how.  The connections we had on earth have not changed following her death ---- just the format has been altered.  She has moved on in her journey and her spirit , energy and love have not been lost.

To this day and since Melodie's passing,  I am frequently mistaken to be her ----  They come up to me and with great excitement of being in the space of Artist and *Bridgewater's hero, Melodie -Elliott Clark only to find that it was a mistake of false identity. 

I am touched by their enthusiasm however it greatly disturbs me that upon hearing Melodie has passed,  the admirer most often is overcome by sorrow.  Efforts to provide words of comfort are of great need however are not always received in manner in which their sorrow is lessened.

I have often wished that individuals who hear of Melodie's passing had the mindfulness and heart to understand that she is still with us in energy and spirit and wants those who have shared her path to be happy, life-filled and with life's comforts.  

......Nightingale
*Bridgewater - a small town on the South Shore of Nova Scotia - the location of our family home